A brilliant and heartbreaking novel perfect for fans of Thirteen Reasons Why Aysel and Roman are practically strangers, but they ve been drawn into an unthinkable partnership In a month s time, they plan to commit suicide together Aysel knows why she wants to die being the daughter of a murderer doesn t equal normal, well adjusted teenager But she can t figure out why handsome, popular Roman wants to end it alld why he s even determined than she is With the deadline getting closer, something starts to grow between Aysel and Roman a feeling she never thought she would experience It seems there might be something to live for, after all but is Aysel in so deep she can t turn back Anyone who has actually been that sad can tell you that there s nothing beautiful or literary or mysterious about depression.Warga captures that so perfectly I fully expected to find this book uncomfortable It s a book about suicide, so it was never going to be a happy read But I didn t expect Jasmine Warga to display the brutal, ugly truth of how people suffering through depression, social anxiety and grief feel She doesn t pretend to understand the way everyone feels, she doesn t sugarcoat anything or make it seem like a small issue In fact, Warga delicately captures some insight into the confusing, sad and destructive moments of two lives as they commit to making a decision to end everything.Whilst each reason might not make sense to everyone, to Aysel and Roman these reasons are everything They are enough to need to escape Aysel has been planning her own death for a while Probably since the fatal moment her father caused the death of one of her schools best known athletes Aysel feels like she s constantly weighed down by his shadow that somehow she will become just like her father unpredictable and violent Roman has been planning the same Since the death of his sister, a sister under his watch during that time, he can t escape the guilt But he can escape this existence.Both complete strangers but with similar sadness inside them, they join an online Suicide Partners scheme It s essentially a website to connect you with someone else who wants to die, but is afraid they won t be able to follow through, they might get caught, or they need someone to go through it with The sad truth is just that A sad truth Things like this happen all the time, and often get brushed under the carpet.I loved the way Warga captured some of the inner turmoil of each character, and sometimes in such a small, subtle way that these snapshots were all the powerful It just goes to show how important the tiny signs, which seem so insignificant, can be telling us so much about a person and how they truly feel Things like pulling down your sleeves to cover your hands when you re anxious, picking at food because your mind is somewhere else, the urge to tell silly jokes in social situations these are all things close to home for a lot of people, and this cleverly woven element to the story really affected me.Whilst these elements force you to feel that heaviness of being depressed, Aysel and Roman, despite being desperately sad, hide their sadness well In fact, they are not depressing characters to read about at all Aysel is in fact really funny most of the time It s just that her depression is a part of her as well And I really like that this author has been quite frank about this, that awareness of depression not being just a feeling but rather being something tangible you can t escape is really quite powerful.The romance element of this story is kept quite small The characters are interested in moving towards their end goal I did however struggle with the ending Sometimes endings can be super obvious when lots of hints are dropped, and Warga does tend to spoon feed the reader a little with large clues which even the characters notice and comment on, they re that obvious and this spoils the story ahead a little The ending was therefore entirely obvious towards the end, which was a shame.Otherwise though, a really fantastic book with some clever ideas and an interesting approach to a difficult subject I hope people read this, if only to open their eyes to what might be happening to those around them, it certainly did for me. Really loved this book I believe that the way the sorry between the two characters develops is real and truthful Also the fact that while you re reading, you can feel there is a real experience behind it You have to fight back. Excellent quality, delivery on time and it was a pretty good book If you like this genre, I m sure you re gonna enjoy it. I was a bit worried I would find this book too depressing, given the tender subject matter of two teenagers who engage in a suicide pact Once I started reading, I could not put it down though I was even reading it while cooking the dinner at times This is the story of Aysel who is terrified the blackness inside of her is the same as the blackness that caused her dad to commit a violent and unforgivable act The entire town looks at her differently now and she can t help wondering if she is cut from the same cloth Drenched in sadness and hopelessness, she begins to trawl suicide sites in order to find a partner to end it all with She finds Roman On the surface, they couldn t be different Aysel has always been a misfit and an outsider, whilst Roman is a popular and good looking basketball player Roman, however, is haunted by devastating guilt He blames himself for his little sister s death and can see no way out but suicide This book is told from Aysel s POV and I absolutely loved her She was sort of tough and gritty around the edges, either silent or sarcastic I loved how delicately the author weaved her life into Roman s They got to know each other so slowly and carefully, none of it rushed I was holding my breath at times, willing Aysel to embrace the joy she couldn t help feeling when in Roman s presence I was scared of the ending, as I had invested myself in these two characters so much But it didn t let me down one bit Beautiful in every way Highly recommended